WHY????!!!

Why do I always seem to have problems with the way this world is? Why can’t it be a little saner? Why do you think I’m talking like this?

Why, for starters, do I have to justify every little deed I do? Why do I have to be like the kids of my parent’s friends who have flown to US? Why can’t I be successful in my own way, my own right? Why is it wrong, if achieving my goals my way takes a lotta time? Why can’t I be allowed to take that risk? Why before 30 do I have to be married, employed and have kids? Why isn’t a live-in relationship acceptable if that’s what I want? Why would an arranged marriage with an unknown someone turn out to be perfect? Why won’t that unknown someone not turn out to be a psycho?

Why must my pals who have GFs and BFs suddenly seem different and changed? Why do they always land up with an evolved strain of Yoko Ono? Why then do they stick to their mobiles like leeches? Why do they have less time for finer things in life like flirt, porn, sleepovers and PS2? Why then do they only have time when they are in need of money? Why don’t I believe in having a flirtatious fling just to flaunt my status? Why does wasting my precious little time and freedom on an egoistic guy, with wild airs, matter to me? Why aren’t there more Drew Barrymores?

Why do we live in a hypocritical society which tries to alienate itself from new concepts, terming them Western? Why are these people the very same individuals who tease, molest or rape women? Why do certain individuals think they have to tell us what we should do and what we should not do? Why should they think they have a right to govern our lives? Why do we quietly listen to their crap and not raise a voice or simply stick a rusted, metal stick up their ass?

Why does a stupid little professor tell us what to watch and what not to watch? Why don’t they realize that if they don’t want to watch it they can shut the channel, TV or their God Damn Eyes? Why does the damn government always rule in their favour completely forgetting the fact that we are actually living in a democracy which if I am right gives us a right to choose? Why then because of these individuals are we deprived of good, artistic products and not to forget porn?

Why are some people cool and some not? Why doesn’t everyone get it that there is no such thing as cool or uncool but simple marketing strategies to sell stuff through know faces? Why are people dumb enough to fall for that? Why don’t we have preachers like Cobain anymore? Why can’t we have artists like Floyd, Metallica, ACDC, and Ozzy? Why do we have to compromise on nerds like Limp Bizkit? Why do people think Julia Roberts is beautiful and Mallika Sherawat is hot? Why to me then is Julia talented but not beautiful and Mallika a loud mouth Drag Queen? Why is ‘The Man’ still driving our society?

Why do only half the people who read this take my thoughts seriously? Why do the rest wonder about my condition and hope I find solace in asylum? Why would some guys who read this actually perceive me to be interesting in a weird kind of way? Why would I never get to meet them? Why is the world like this? Why does it suck to be a part of it?

Why would I never find my answers and still continue to live with whatever life I’m endowed with? WHY?

A BRIDGE TOO FAR!

The Lord surveyed the Ram Setu and said “Hanuman, how diligently and strenuously you and your vanara sena had built this bridge several centuries back. It is remarkable that it has withstood the ravages of the climatic and geographical changes over centuries. It is indeed an amazing feat especially considering the fact that a bridge at Hyderabad built by Gammon using latest technology collapsed the other day even before they could stick the posters on its pillars.”

Hanuman with all humility spoke “Jai Sri Ram, it is all because of your grace. We just scribbled your name on the bricks and threw them in the sea and they held. No steel from TISCO or cement from Ambuja or ACC was ever used. But Lord, why rake up the old issue now.”

Ram spoke “Well, Hanuman some people down there want to demolish the bridge and construct a canal. The contract involves lot of money and lot of money will be made. They will make money on demolition and make more money on construction. ”

Hanuman humbly bowed down and said “Why not we go down and present our case”

Ram said “Times have changed since we were down there. They will ask us to submit age proof and we don’t have either a birth certificate or school leaving certificate. We traveled mainly on foot and some times in bullock carts and so we don’t have a driving license either. As far as the address proof is concerned the fact that I was born at Ayodhya is itself under litigation for over half a century, If I go in a traditional attire with bow and arrow, the ordinary folks may

recognize me but Arjun Singh may take me to be some tribal and, at the most, offer a seat at IIT under the reserved category. Also, a God cannot walk in dressed in a three-piece suit and announce his arrival. It would make even the devotees suspicious. So it is dilemma so to say.”

“I can vouch for you by saying that I personally built the bridge.”

“My dear, Anjani putra, it will not work. They will ask you to produce the lay-out plan, the project details, including financial outlay and how the project cost was met and the completion certificate. Nothing is accepted without documentary evidence in India . You may cough but unless a doctor certifies it, you have no cough. A pensioner may present himself personally but the authorities do not take it as proof. He has to produce a life-certificate to prove that he is alive. It is that complicated.”

“Lord can’t understand these historians. Over the years you have given darshan once every hundred years to saints like Surdas, Tulsidas, Saint Thyagaraja, Jayadeva, Bhadrachala Ramdas and even Sant Tukaram and still they disbelieve your existence and say Ramayana is a myth. The only option, I see, is to re-enact Ramayana on earth and set the government records straight once for all.”

Lord smiled “It isn’t that easy today. Ravan is apprehensive that he may look like a saint in front of Karunanidhi. I also spoke to his mama Mareecha, who appeared as a golden deer to tempt Sita maiyya when I was in the forest and he said that he won’t take a chance of stepping on earth as long as Salman Khan is around.”